Dear world

Dear world, what is happening in parts of Germany last night and the night before does not represent all of Germany, least of all all Germans.
70 years after the end of WW2 some several hundreds of people are on the streets, violently protesting against refugees and foreigners – and the police seems unable to protect those, that need protection most, those that have been through living hell the last months, when they left behind all they had and escaped with their lifes, and we all know that not all of them succeeded on the way.
I’d like to say that it’s only a part of Germany, only Saxony – but while that is true it does not make it better. Germans are violently fighting against foreigners.
I can’t quite tell you how much this hurts and is embarassing and I have trouble describing what this does even with my ample background in non-violent communication. I feel deeply sad, it truly brings tears to my eyes thinking of those poor people which are seeking for nothing else but some safety, calmness and maybe even a feeling of belonging together.
Maybe that is exactly my problem here – I do not belong to those Germans that raise their hands (and weapons and hate-speech) against refugees, I violently refuse to be named “German” in the same sentence as those.
Besides that sadness there is a good part of fury. Were I to decide at this second and had I the possibility I would probably take those people and send them onto some forgotten island to live by themselves. I know, that is not very non-violent, I should understand that those protesters likely also have their needs unfulfilled and that the actual problems are somewhere deeper and hidden – and have not been addressed by politics properly since 1989. I know that. I do. Still, don’t give me proper weapons at this time.
Dear world – I don’t know what else to say. What’s worse, I don’t know what to do.
Signed, André, earth inhabitant

My first

Well, here I am.

Somehow I don’t quite know, yet, how often I will write here but my intentions are to regularly write something here.

Not just something, to be sure – I’d like to share my thoughts about and experiences with Marshall Rosenberg’s non-violent-communication, about empathy, about compassionate thinking and speaking and I might write down things that I believe could be helpful. I might also write down thoughts about current issues or just simply forget the kindness for a second and spill my guts – or as I prefer to say: “be authentic”.

I could start by stating my ideas about being authentic.
I find that, especially in internet forums or blogs, being authentic is often misunderstood as being plain rude and insulting others. I believe there is a difference. Being authentic the way I understand it is, even more than usually, being connected to youself and not to what the others did or said. Being authentic might be being in pain and telling another person exactly that. “Sorry, bro’, but this hurts! I feel sad and hurt and hell, yes, I am angry!” But that it not the same as “Bro’, you hurt me! Whatever you said was bs and you’re wrong with that!”
Do you notice the difference? The first outburst is clearly made of I-messages, I am with myself at that point. I hurt. I am angry. The second outburst is you-messages. Problem being:  you-messages will probably never solve any situation and mostly won’t even make anyone feel better. They will just raise more tensions because the other side will automatically turn into “defending myself”-mode.

Now – I am not saying that I-messages will lead to immediate relief or having a beer together but at least it does not attack the other involved person and it is pure authenticity – it is what is living inside me now.

Well, that’s it for now. My first. Comments welcome 🙂